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People Don't Want a Friendly
Church...
As you read the title you were probably questioning it. Is it
true people don’t want a friendly church? If they don’t want a
friendly church, why are we always talking about being friendly? If
they don’t want a friendly church, what DO they want?
I don’t remember where I heard the quote but I believe it is true:
“People don’t want a friendly church. They want a friend.”
What does this mean? Do people not want a friendly church? Yes, they
do, but that is only the beginning — what they are really looking
for is a friend. If you are looking for a friend you usually begin
with someone who is friendly, not someone who ignores you or is rude
to you.
But the fact that someone is friendly doesn’t necessarily mean they
will be your friend. Being friendly doesn’t require the sustained
effort that being a friend does. It is one thing to be friendly for
the 4-5 hours a week that we spend together “at church.” It is quite
another to be a friend at not only those times, but at other times
during the week. “A man who has friends must himself be friendly,
but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” (Prov.
18:24) Friends spend time together — that’s what builds their
friendship. They may work together, they will certainly worship
together, and they may go out to eat, have a picnic, put on a fish
fry, play games, or just sit and talk.
Being a friend requires much more than the investment of time — it
will require you to listen, to share, and even to open yourself up
to another. There is an emotional commitment — to share the good
times, the bad times, even to correct them when you must. “As the
iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his
friend.” (Prov. 27:17) You will probably have to laugh at some of
the same jokes over and over (just like they do yours), you will
have to not only vent to them, but really listen when they vent to
you. “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born to
adversity.” (Prov. 17:17)
The quote is right — what people really want is a friend, or
friends. Are you willing to make the commitment to be a friend to a
new Christian, or a new member or family in the congregation? They
will benefit, but so will you. ~
Tol Burke
(Editor's note: Tol Burk is a gospel preacher who works with
congregations in the Caribbean, particularly Puerto Rico, and other
central American countries.)
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 "Every
Man Did What Was Right In His Own Eyes"
Driving in Puerto Rico is a real experience. The traffic is heavy
and there aren't enough roads for all of us which leads some people
to do some crazy things. Most traffic lights, for example, have left
turn lanes with an arrow. But if the line is too long in that lane,
someone will pull into the adjoining lane and turn left from that
one--in front of those in the real turn lane if they can. They will
even occasionally U-turn from this lane in front of you. If you are
foolish enough to stop at a red light when there is no traffic you
will either get honked at or more likely, they will just go around
you and run the light.
On Fridays and Saturdays the traffic will frequently back up so that
people will block the entrance/exit of our subdivision. Of course
when we get our short light we cannot move, but don't worry that
just means we move as soon as we can, thus cutting into the light of
the people across from us, so they run their red light, thus cutting
short those turning left into the neighborhood, which blocks those
going on the highway--I think you get the picture. I'm learning how
to position myself in a left turn lane, etc. so that I effectively
block as many as possible so they HAVE to let me go. Otherwise, I
could sit there a good while.
What is really amusing (and dangerous) is to see semi trucks
switching lanes, riding peoples bumpers, etc. as if they were a
small car. I think it must be so ingrained in people they don't even
realize that they are doing it. Our backyard is bordered by a creek,
which is bordered by a 6 lane road. Hardly a week goes by that we
don't hear a wreck from our yard and we see at least one a week.
You probably are wondering what all my ranting has to do with the
title--a quote from the book of Judges. Everything!! Judges recounts
what happened in Israel when there was no king--no leadership,
"every man did what was right in his own eyes". Some examples of the
results are recorded in the last 3-4 chapters, one of which almost
lead to the extermination of the tribe of Benjamin.
In Puerto Rican traffic there is no law (it exists, but a law that
is not enforced ceases to be a law) so every man does what he wants
to do. The result is total chaos. It is no different in society at
large--when a society rejects authority eventually it will
deteriorate into chaos. Western society is a good example of this
today. When no one tries to enforce right and wrong chaos will
always result.
It is no different in the church either. When brethren reject
authority not only chaos but division will follow. 1 Cor. 11 says as
much: "there must be division among you that those who are approved
may be made manifest." Some will stand for the truth when others
leave it, so there will be division and every evil work.
What is your attitude toward authority? If God and His Word are not
paramount in your live, you are at least sowing the seeds of chaos
for your children, if not yourself. ~
Tol Burk |
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 The
Christian and the Tongue
Ronnie Whittemore
In his "sermon on the mount" Jesus describes his faithful followers
as the "salt of the earth" and as shining lights (Matt. 5:13-16).
The Christian can and should influence others to "deny himself, pick
up his cross, and follow" Jesus (Matt. 16:24). A life of firm
convictions, constant duty, and godly living will point the way of
righteousness to others. Working hands, ready feet, and a
compassionate heart also will aid in one's influence toward others.
But perhaps there is one member of the human body which yields more
influence than any other, and that is, the tongue.
This small, but powerful instrument, when used improperly, destroys
and devours. When used as a device of Satan, it often causes
irreparable damage. However, this same organ, when properly
controlled, becomes a great weapon for truth. One cannot be a
faithful doer of God's word without controlling his organ of speech.
"If any man among you seem to be religious, and bridles not his
tongue, but deceives his own heart, this man's religion is vain"
(Jam. 1:26). It is quite evident from this passage that an enormous
amount of good can be lost due to an uncontrollable tongue. Those
things, which proceed out of the mouth, will be judged in the last
day (Matt. 12:35-37). So great responsibility rests with every
individual for not only his thoughts and deeds, but his speech as
well.
1. Gossip. This device of the devil is completely opposite to the
attitude of love and concern for others (Matt. 5:43; 18:15-20). The
fearless apostle Paul wrote, "Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a
fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of
meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted" (Gal.
6:1).
The harm of malicious gossip cannot be measured. The wise man
Solomon, recorded, "The words of a talebearer are as wounds, and
they go down into the innermost parts of the belly" (Prov. 26:22).
Before hearing or spreading rumors or gossip, one should answer some
basic, yet important questions. Is it true? Will it do any good to
hear or tell it? Would I want the person or persons involved to
overhear what I say to others?
"Someone has described gossip in these words: 'I am more deadly than
the screaming shell from the howitzer; I break hearts and wreck
lives. I have no respect for truth or justice, no mercy for the
defenseless. You will find me in the pews of the pious and the
haunts of the unholy. I am wily, cunning, malicious, and I gather
strength with age. I make my way where greed, mistrust, and dishonor
are unknown. I feed on good and bad alike. My victims are as
numerous as the sands of the sea and often as innocent. I never
forgive and seldom forget. My name is gossip" (Teacher's Annual
Lesson Commentary, Nov. 2, 1958, p. 233).
Every person should take great thought before saying unfavorable
things of others.
2. Lies. The author of all lies is Satan (John 8:44). He uttered the
first lie to Eve when he said, "Ye shall not surely die".._(Gen,
3:4).
There are few negative parts recorded by inspiration of the life of
Abraham, but on two occasions, Abram lied about Sarah, his wife,
calling Sarah, his sister unto Pharaoh (Gen. 12:13) and Abimelech
(Gen. 20:2). Yet someone argues, "Abraham told the truth; for Sarah
was his half-sister." But deception was the intent of Satan's lie to
Eve and likewise, Abram's intent was to deceive the leaders of those
countries for fear of his own life; therefore, showing a lack of
faith in God Almighty who promised to lead, guide, and protect Abram
and his household.
Another example of lying is found in Acts 5:1-11 in the earlier days
of the church. Two children of God, Ananias and Sapphire, attempted
to deceive their brethren and the apostles by saying that they sold
a certain possession and gave the whole amount to God. But the truth
is that this couple kept a part of the price and lied in order to
appear better than they actually were. Their intention was to
deceive. As a result of their sin, their lives were taken by God,
bringing fear upon all the church and those that heard.
Lying and the telling of falsehoods is one of the gravest sins of
the tongue. James describes the tongue as "a fire, a world of
iniquity" (Jam. 3:6) and how accurate this is; for, one usually has
to tell more and more lies to cover the ones which already have been
told. Finally, the Bible says that the destination of all liars is
"the lake which burns with fire and brimstone: which is the second
death" (Rev. 21:8).
One may work with his hands, worship with his heart, yet allow a
loose tongue to close the doors of heaven. Every Christian should
exercise patience and temperance in guarding his tongue. When this
is accomplished, then the Christian will develop the type of
character that God will save. ~
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